Brown Eyes
by ArtAnchor
Summary: I would do anything to have him. Be anyone to touch him, to see his smile and know that I had kissed the lips that made it. But I know, deep down, beneath that perfect pale skin, there's something dark. Darker and more lonely than his endless brown eyes. And I know I'd do anything to save him.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter one

Stiles Stilinski was never too great with making friends, and he was blind as to why. With his good looks and charm he should be swarming with people around him. Or so he seemed to think. Okay so he didn't have muscles, he was almost always on his ass while the rest of the lacrosse team played, he wasn't cool, and he was so awkward around girls that Scott seemed to think it was a joke. But it was on the inside that counted right? That made Stiles feel even worse. He was broken in there as well, he even had the pills he took every day to prove it. But when he thought about where he would be spending his Sunday night, he never expected it to be with Derek Hale.

The night air nipped at his nose and cheeks turning them a bright red. Stiles curled up closer into the hood of his sweater, basking in the heated breathes he felt when he attempted to warm his hands. But that somehow made him even colder when the heat faded. He crammed them back into his pockets and focused on keeping his feet from fumbling over the roots and stray branches that peeked out of the forest floor.

"Hey Stiles, what did you do on your Sunday night?" He muttered to himself, moonlight catching the steam of his breath. "Oh you know, I hung out in the woods." He looked up at the darkness stretching further than his eyes could see. Light shining in rays from where the canopy of the trees broke. "The creepy, creepy woods." Though he usually spent his nights sleeping like a normal human being, the memories of his nightmare danced inside his mind. His raw eyes were begging for him to think about anything else. He always seemed to find himself here after a bad night, wandering aimlessly through the backwoods of Beacon hills, watching tree after tree pass as he listened to their fallen leaves crumple beneath his careful footing. It was somehow soothing to hear their crunch fill the air. Stiles had always loved autumn in Beacon hills, mostly for the colors, though there was the fact- Stiles stopped in his footsteps. _You came out here to get away from that thought. _He rattled his brain trying to focus on something else when he realized that the leaves never stopped their mantra. Something was following him. He couldn't help the playback in his mind of every scary movie ever created or the cold shiver that ran up his spine. _Fuck, fuck, fuck_ He tried to move but his muscles had locked; he stood powerless. The sound grew closer and closer until it stopped right behind him. _No. I'm not dying now._ He clenched his fingers and turned around throwing his fist wherever it would hit something.  
"WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME?!" He screamed at the top of his lungs, hoping someone would hear. But it would be to no avail, he had traveled so deeply into the woods by now, anyone else out here was probably also an axe murderer. Throwing all his weight into the punch he stumbled when his wrist was snatched before it had touched the silhouette. Stiles' heart sank into his stomach, goose bumps running wild across his skin.

"Stiles?" Another voice tested cautiously. The boy gaped, a wave of embarrassment and anger crashed into his heart, successfully restarting it.

"Derek?!" He asked ripping his hand back. "Oh my god, you scared the living hell out of me."

"What do you think you're doing out here?"Derek asked flinching as Stiles fumbled his phone to shine the light on the alpha's face.

"Me?" Stiles' swallowed his urge to vomit. "What are you doing out here?!" Adrenaline sent shocks through his fragile body making him shiver. Derek was silent.

"You shouldn't be out so late," he replied, completely avoiding the question. Stiles ran his fingers through his hair, taking a deep breath trying to steady himself. He took a moment before he replied, turning his back on the silhouette.

"I'm a teenager, staying out past curfew is part of the job description." He took half a step somehow knowing he'd only be yanked back.

"You're fired," Derek mutters. "Go home."

"Oh, I'm sorry I didn't realize you owned the entire wood to yourself." Stiles rolled his eyes smacking away Derek's hand from his hood, pulling on the zipper so it wasn't choking him.

"Actually,"Derek grabbed him again shoving him past a couple of trees. They stepped into the clearing where his house sat broken and falling apart at the seams. "Just this part." Stiles glared, clenching his phone in his pocket. "Why are you even out here? Aren't parties and alcohol part of the description as well?" Right, like Stiles would ever get invited to a party or go to one unless Scott dragged him.

"Yeah they are, I'm surprised you remember."

"I read it somewhere." Derek growled quietly, waiting for an answer. But Stiles' mind had already wandered off the subject; if he took the dirt path behind Derek's house he'd be back to the main one. He could get home in an hour and he had had enough of the night.

"Yeah, sure." Stiles said distantly, forgetting their conversation. He backed away until he was a safe distance that Derek couldn't snatch his hood. But Derek only followed until Stiles bumped into his Camaro. Derek was searching his eyes for something. "I'm gonna go.", Stiles squeaked nervously. But his muscles had locked up once again.

"Stay here." Derek growled quietly. Stiles nodded and Derek walked into his gloomy house. This was just what Stiles needed. A grumpy werewolf to ask him a whole bunch of pointless questions because Stiles would never tell the truth. He vowed to keep his nightmares to himself. He was pathetic enough in everyone else's eyes and he didn't need them knowing he was awake over something as stupid as a bad dream. The Camaro's lights flashed once and Stiles watched Derek walk to the driver side.  
"Get in," he said unlocking the doors.

"A-are you serious?" Stiles froze, his mouth hanging open. "_Me_? In _your_ Camaro?!"

Derek ignored him once again ducking into his car and slamming the door behind him. Stiles stood in shock for a moment before sliding his hand against the door until his fingers reached the dip of the handle. _How bad could it be?_  
It took Stiles about two seconds after they left the safety of the trees to realize that he was in a car with Derek Hale and it took him even longer to realize that it was because he was doing something nice.

"So," Stiles said, taking a peek at the Alpha beside him. Derek's hair was disheveled and he had dark circles lightly placed beneath his eyes. The light from the stereo illuminated him face. There was a certain darkness to the way he watched the road. "What were you doing out in the woods at three o'clock in the morning?" he tried to ease up on the question, make it sound natural, but failed miserably. Derek lowered his eyes.

"Walking." He said distantly. Stiles continued to stare at his chiseled features, the heaters blasted against his red cheeks. The answer wouldn't have surprised Stiles if it were actually true. Stiles never realized how easily he could tell that someone was lying, but after all he did have lots of practice. He smiled slightly at his next thought and turned back toward his window. If Derek had asked him again, he probably would have said the same thing. It looked like Stiles wasn't the only one who liked to keep certain things to himself.  
The silence of Derek's car was somehow a lullaby itself. Even his thoughts seemed intimidated by the guy. They still had a ten minute drive ahead of them.

"Stiles," Derek said uncomfortably. "I don't think you should go in the woods anymore-"

"It was a one time thing, I won't do it anymore." He said quickly not meeting the hazel eyes. Derek let out an extensive sigh but said nothing. The rest of the drive was a lull all but for the click of the seatbelt when Derek pulled up beside the curb. There were no goodbyes or sentiments. And when he reached his room he threw himself onto his bed, staring at the ceiling. He listened for anything to hear: a bump in the night, the sound of his breathing, a brave thought that dared to stray from the others who were still hiding. But all he heard was the Camaro's engine fading away. And Stiles had no idea why but he gave a weak smile.

It wasn't until later that day Stiles felt the wonders of sleep deprivation. Even though he had stayed awake tossing and turning all night in his bed he felt most sleepy listening to his best friend when lunch rolled around.

"Her skin, Stiles. It's so soft." And even though Scott said his name, Stiles knew he wasn't really talking to him. "Oh, really?" The teen muttered rolling the tater tots around on his plate. The cafeteria was buzzing with chatter. There were always people talking about something; college, final exams, plans for after school, and then there was Scott, always talking about Allison. Today it happened to be her skin, when yesterday it was her eyes and the day before it had been her kisses. It was like Scott was just an endless book, always finding new ways to make Stiles' mind wander elsewhere. He was the very definition for Stiles' Adderall, or the warning to why it might not work too well. It took him a while before he became conscious of his best friend staring him down.

"What?" He asked looking at his shirt. "There something on me?"

When he looked up Scott's eyes were glowing a warm golden.  
"Why do you smell like Derek?" He asked suspiciously. Stiles shoved the tater tots in his mouth, though he was so not hungry and shrugged. Explaining he was with Derek would ensure he'd have to explain why he was in the woods. And then he'd have to talk about the nightmares. And that was impossible. Just the thought made Stiles shiver.

"S'not me." He said through his favorite crispy food. Scott lowered his eyes into a glare, his eyebrows knitting together. Stiles searched his brain for an answer before Scott could ask, when the bell suddenly rang throughout the cafeteria. He grabbed his backpack and bolted from his seat.

"Stiles!", Scott tried, but the room was flooding with people. There was no way he could find his nervous best friend much less his scent.  
Stiles spent the rest of his day exhausted and irritable, trudging through his classes and barely listening to his teachers drone on. He wanted more than anything to go home and sleep but at the same time he couldn't think of anything worse.

After lacrosse practice he took a long awaited shower, letting the hot water cascade over his aching muscles and trying not to think about what he'd do to put off sleeping.

"Stiles!" The door shivered beneath his dads fist.

For a reason unknown to Stiles, his dad always thought he turned deaf in the shower.

"Yeah?" He called back turning off the water and grabbing a towel. He tried to avoid his reflection in the mirror as he dried off his hair.

"I've got a gourmet dinner waiting downstairs and your up here pruning like a raisin." He said.

Stiles smirked. "What toppings did you get?"

"The only kind you'll eat."

Stiles heard his footsteps as he retreated back for the pizza that waited downstairs. And Stiles' followed quickly after. Dinners at the Stilinski house were quick, so quick they didn't bother sitting down at the dining room table. Instead they stuffed their faces while leaning on counters across from one another and if there was something to talk about it was a slim chance they'd ever get around to it. So Stiles was taken back when his dad spoke between a mouthful of his slice of supreme.

"Stiles. Your okay right?"

Stiles stopped his mouth from closing around the food and looked at him in shock.

"I'm just fine, why?"

"Just making sure...if there is anything you need to, you know, talk about. I'm always here."

Stiles smiled downing the last of his pizza and giving his dad a squeezing hug.

"Yeah..." He whispered tightly. "I know."

Stiles' wanted so badly for that to be true. But his dad didn't need to be reminded of the most depressing thing to ever happen the to Stilinski family. Just because Stiles was having trouble with dealing with it, didn't mean he needed to drag his dad down with him. "I love you, dad."

"Yeah, yeah." He chuckled. "I love you too."

And with that Stiles headed for his room.

"Get some sleep tonight!" The sheriff called after him.

"Not likely." Stiles whispered to himself, shutting the door behind him.

Out of everything in the world, anything to think about, anything to dream about. Why did it have to be her? Her warmth as it spread from her fingertips to his heart, the way she could melt a maddening thought in a matter of seconds, the way she smiled, the way she smells, the sound of her laugh, that look she gave him like there was nothing and no one more important. And the thing he hated most about the dreams, was waking up. Lying in bed for that aching second, remembering reality. And that sinking feeling when he looked at his hands, and realized he'd never really see or feel those things ever again. Because she was long gone and she had taken something of Stiles that he needed most. His mom.

**Thank you so much for reading! This is my first fanfic so I'm sorry if I messed up anywhere. I'm new at this. But I love Stereks so I thought I'd try it out. Please review! **


	2. Chapter 2

"I'll kill him."

Darkness painted the atmosphere around him as Derek Hale paced the floor of his bedroom, annoyance twisting his handsome face into a scowl. Nightfall smothered the forest outside his home drinking every drop of warmth it had to offer and leaving it cold and desolate. Frigidness laughed around every corner, crept inside every shadow waiting for a victim to drench in shivers, but the anger and confusion running through him kept the young man fevered. And with each new thought that crossed his mind, he walked a little faster, clenched his fists a little tighter and it was all thanks to a certain hyperactive teenager. Derek paused, the floorboards creaking in protest beneath his feet. A _teenager_. A kid that weighed no more than 147 pounds was somehow crushing him. And what pissed Derek off the most, was that Stiles didn't even realize he was doing it. All it took was a little taste of the boy's scent, a glimpse at his soft brown eyes and Derek's mind was running haywire. And if something as simple as smile could render the alpha helpless, imagine what a tear could do. Derek grimaced, gulping back a shaky breath in an attempt to gather his scattered thoughts.

It had been a total of four days since Derek confronted Stiles in the woods, since Stiles had promised it was a one time thing-since he had lied. Derek knew he should have pushed further for the truth, but the look on Stiles' face told him he would never get it. Obviously he hadn't told anybody about his little nature walks, otherwise they would have stopped a long time ago and if Stiles hadn't told Scott what was really bothering him, or even his own father, what in hell made Derek think he'd want to tell him?

So he pathetically sat by, listening to the formless whispers of Stiles' sobs, feeling the overwhelming misery as it slowly consumed the boy and each and every night Stiles came and went, Derek's composure broke little by little-

_Crunch_

The alpha froze everything falling silent when the sound reached his ears, his heart, his breathes, even his thoughts. He pleaded with his senses, begging for just once that they were mistaken, but the familiar disturbance of leaves crumbling beneath gentle footsteps only continued, becoming closer and closer until it was louder than his restless heartbeat. Derek couldn't take it anymore, falling against his bed he hid his fingers in his silky hair.

"If this continues," He seethed. "I'll _make_ him tell me."

...

Stiles stood at the edge of his driveway, staring at the empty space beside his lonesome jeep. The police car had disappeared from its side once again, or maybe it hadn't even returned from last night when his dad announced he would be working late. He realized than that his jeep and him were in the same boat. He sniffled, wiping the tears that stained his cheeks with his sleeve, cringing because it had already been soaked with them. His dads shifts were starting to grow longer lately, but Stiles was to exhausted to ask what had the station so busy. Distance was developing between the two, and that was the last thing he wanted. He pats the jeeps hood fondly as he passes, the metal is almost as cold as he is. Stiles pulls out his phone as he enters through his front door, feeling the familiar chill of an empty house as he heads upstairs for his room. He scrolls through his contacts, finding the name he needed and hesitating before starting the call. He picked up on the third ring.

"Hello?"

"Dad," Stiles' heart warmed at the word and he felt a million times better hearing his fathers voice. "Hey."

"Stiles," He said, his voice seemed distant, suspicion slithering through his words. "Your up awfully early, what are you doin' awake bud?" The boy smirked; he was good about climbing into bed at the very last second, just before his dad opened the door and checked on him when leaving for work.

"I could ask you the same, ya know." He growled, searching his closet for the clothes he would wear today. School didn't start for another two hours, but there really wasn't anything else he could do. "Dad you should get some sleep," He almost laughed at how hypocritical that sounded. "Are they ever going to let you come home?"

"They need me here," the sheriff said. Stiles growled again. "But I'll come home tonight. Promise." He saved quickly.

"Good." He heard his dad mutter something along the lines of 'just like his mom' to himself as he threw a pair of jeans on his bed picking out a plaid shirt and tossing that along with it. "The usual for dinner then?" The sheriff snorted on the other end, a sound that made Stiles smile as well.

"Yes sir."

"Looking forward to it, I'll see you dad. Love you."

"I love you too. Bye kiddo."

He ended the call and decided on having a shower to pass the time. It was only when steam started to fog the mirrors that Stiles realized just how cold he was. He let the steam snake around his body giving off the feeling that he had just stepped into a furnace before moving into the waters path. He was admiring the way it seemed to make his goose bumps vanish, when suddenly a growl emitted from his stomach.

He wished, whatever the case was that his dad was working on, that it would be solved soon. He missed having someone to eat breakfast with, or rather someone to help him make breakfast because Stiles was a _terrible_ cook. His dad would always remark on how he never understood where he got that trait from. His mother was an amazing cook, his father not too bad himself, but Stiles somehow managed to burn the simplest thing and ruin a dinner in a matter of seconds. But despite that, his parents never denied it when he asked to help in the kitchen. Of course, most of the time it was help clean spoons coated in cake batter, or taste test things to 'check for poison'.

Stiles felt his heart tighten and tug, his handsome face falling into a glare. On cue a million thoughts entered his head, one of them happening to be that he needed to take his Adderall. So after finishing his shower, he brushed his teeth, quickly getting dressed for what was about to be a very long day. They all seemed to be long lately, as if they were dragging their feel along with Stiles. Each hour seemed endless, classes, lunch, lacrosse practice, they were all becoming almost unbearable. If he could just get one full night of sleep maybe it'd get better. Maybe he'd have the strength to make it through a day of Scott's daydreaming, or two hours of being trampled by the guys on the team. _Sleep_. Stiles tightened his hold on his backpack, his eyebrows pulling together when he slung it over his shoulder. He eyed the fridge as he poured the pills into his hand, his stomach releasing another begging groan. But Stiles needed to get out of the house, needed to be around people. Even if he didn't know who they were, anything was better than being in a hollow home. He could kill half an hour at the high school until classes started.

He tossed his backpack in the back seat and hopped into his jeep. There were about two things that would guarantee Stiles a clear mind. One of them was driving. Every time he started the engine of his jeep he just seemed to relax, nothing mattered when he was driving. Not sleep, not school, nothing. Stiles almost didn't want to park when he arrived at the barren parking lot of the school, but he pulled into the closest parking space to the entrance and closed the door behind him, pausing with his fingers on the door handle. A strange feeling washed over him making him shiver and pull away.

Only a handful of students wondered the halls, most of them as groggy and irritable as he was. But there were some who gave off the impression that waking up this early didn't bother them. Danny was one of those people, his crosse was slung over his shoulder and he was walking with a group of guys. He met Stiles' eyes and smiled warmly mouthing the words 'good morning'. Stiles gave a smile back, Danny was probably one of the sweetest kids on the lacrosse team, unlike his best friend who happened to be walking right beside him, giving Stiles a dry look. He nudged Jackson in the ribs, not even needing to see his face to know the unpleasant look that was on it. They rounded a corner where Stiles caught a glimpse of Jackson grudgingly shoving at Danny's shoulder and Danny laughing with the sweetest smile pulling at his lips. Even though Jackson Whittemore may have been an asshole but he had one hell of a best friend.

Stiles was so absorbed in his thoughts he barley noticed when he was joined on the walk to his locker. He peeked to the side where he found Isaac indifferently walking beside him, his eyes fixed on the floor. Stiles slowed his pace, expecting Isaac to walk ahead of him, but the teen only followed finally looking at Stiles with a shy smile.

"Isaac." He said. "Need something?" Isaac pursed his lips in thought before he shook his head.

"No, nothing in particular." Stiles nodded shrugging and returning his gaze to his locker at the end of the hallway. Isaac was another one of those people on the lacrosse team who just seemed to radiate warmth, but he kept his distance from other people. Isaac was incredibly kind, but Stiles always thought he looked- "You just looked lonely."

Something inside Stiles broke, making his legs unable to function. He unthinkingly met Isaac's eyes, his mouth slightly hanging open._ Lonely_. Stiles was lonely. He had been trying to find a word that would describe the feeling in the pit of his stomach, the tugging at his heart. And that was it exactly. _But why would I be lonely?!_ _I have Scott_- his thoughts were cut off. Even he knew that whenever him and his best friend were together, Scott was never really there. _My dad_- is always at work. _Lydia_-barley knew he even existed. Isaac cocked his head to the side, trying to decipher what was clouding Stiles' thoughts, before the boy came to. A nervous smile plastered on his face.

"Me?" He said breathlessly. "Lonely?" Stiles shoved every thought to the back of his mind and shook his head, but they slipped through his fingers and whispered over and over again. Lonely. Isaac noticed how Stiles' eyes seemed to cloud once again, but there was something else there too. A skip in his steady heartbeat.

"Yeah." Isaac sighed. Stiles wondered if it was really that obvious that something was off about him. Nobody could tell before...but then again, nobody really had the chance. Stiles had drifted away from werewolf's recently, away from everyone. "Jesus Stiles," Isaac's shock brought Stiles back to reality. "You look like hell."

"What do you mean?" He touched his face in a panic.

"Your eyes." They had both completely stopped walking now. "Dude, when was the last time you got any sleep?"

"I've been kinda stressed about the test we have in Chemistry. Mr. Harris will torture me if I fail."

"Since when are you stressed about a test?" Stiles chuckled his gaze returning to the floor.

"Good point." He said anxiously, continuing his footsteps. He'd have to think of a different excuse to use from now on. He set the thought aside with the rest of them. "I'm fine, don't worry about me." Sidekicks are always fine, he can't lose his title now, then what he be?

People were starting to fill into the hallway by the time he finally reached his locker. He fumbled with the combination lock, his hands slightly shaking when he finally got it. He threw open the door and grabbed his Chemistry book, then shut it and spun the lock before turning to the werewolf that still stood beside him.

"Isaac, I'll see you at practice tonight." And before Isaac could say another thing Stiles melted in with the crowd and disappeared. That's all he seemed to be doing lately. Running away.

The rest of the day went along just as the others had, and Stiles endured each and every second. Lacrosse went just as planned, and Stiles endured each and every elbow and soon to be new bruises. And when he returned home everything went as the routine called for.

"Dad?" He called when he opened the front door. "Dad?" There were sudden footsteps at the top of the stairs and down came the sheriff dressed in his uniform. Stiles let his bag drop to the floor beside him and glared.

"Hey bud." He said, his apologetic smile wavering just barley. Stiles took a moment to answer, the ripping in his chest taking his words away.

"The usual for dinner then?" He asked. "Pizza for one."

"I'm sorry Stiles, I was going to stay home I really was but they just called me in again-"

"No dad. Don't worry about it." The word returned, practically screaming in Stiles' ears. _Lonely_. "I'll be fine." His dad pulled him into a hug that Stiles was almost to weak to return.

"I really am sorry." He whispered, grabbing his coat and gently shutting the door behind him. Stiles stood in place, his pulse rigid in his ears, his body tensing. He needed sleep, or food- he needed something to get his mind cleared. Something to make that awful word disappear. So once the hum of the engine faded away he headed for the one place where he found refuge from his heart wrenching thoughts. The woods.

**Hello there :) I'm sorry this took so long to post. But thank you so much for your patience and support! Please tell me what you think. **


End file.
